The inspiration for this post came when I was watching Sapan Verma’s Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, online. He happened to mention the incident where, in Maharashtra’s Malegaon village the police made it mandatory for cows to have ID cards with their mugshot for easy investigation of cow slaughtering cases. Click here to get some context.
The Maharashtra Police has decided to have cows queue up in front of dilapidated buildings and get themselves registered under the “Beef Bachao Yojana.” One of the reporters from Times of Tomorrow went to ask the cows about how they felt about the scheme when one cow said, “Moo moo mooooooooo?!!!” The reporter probed the cow standing in front of her and he just ran away making a peace out sign with his hooves.
Dejected, the reporter committed suicide.
Later, however, a very dumb officer over thought the need for these ID cards, post using his brain after being in the service for 5 years. According to him, having photo ID’s for cows was not a very sensible idea. After 2 months of research, he found out that all cows look the same and it is difficult to tell one from the other so the purpose of an ID card could not be established.
This officer then came up with another plan.
He requested all the women from in and around Malegaon to donate all their make-up to the police authorities. The police officer then used this makeup to give every cow his/her “individual niche look” with the help of some local beauticians. The mug shots were re-taken and life was easier for the beef banning government.
Years later, however, it was realised that they could have simply put number tags on the cows than wasting resources.
Since then universities and colleges across India, introduced a B.A. in Your brain and how Additionally, a case of sexism and anti-feminism was registered on all the residents of this village for staying in a place called, “MALEgaon.”